Why I am this way
by pandipan
Summary: These are a collection of Short stories about the personal feelings of countries,or fanpairings. This was mostly created for things to write if I get writers block but I will update if I get reviews and people actually like it. Reviews/comments are always loved and I will accept requests! Enjoy! XD
1. Why I am this way-Hong Kong POV

**~ So out of boredom and the fact I kept thinking of the tea family I decided to do a short story on them. This story is from the point of view of Hong Kong who I think is a very misunderstood and stone-faced country. I do not own Hetalia in any way and thank you for reading! Comments are always nice btw *wink wink*~ **

When I think of my childhood, I could say it was happy, loving , and everything you'd expect from the child of a country. I could say all these things, but I'd be lying not only to myself but anyone who reads this. All the memories I have as a child of my mother China, is her mellow voice with a hint of an accent that would sing precious lullabies until I fell asleep. That is the only happy memory of my mother before I was taken away from her. I remember her tears that cried out to the rhythm of the beating military drum, and the smell of gun powder that had lingered in the air for days. I didn't know what was going on at the time, but I knew something was bad. Yet I did not shed a tear that day.

The next day I was on a boat, sailing with my beloved father, England, who looked so pained. As the gentle sea swept us farther from the land I knew so well, a loss was felt deep down, as if I was stripped away of life. Sadness had slowly started to harden my heart, yet I could not let it show in front of my father, who always was strong.

"What's the matter Father?" I asked as he looked back to what I called home.

"Your mother and I felt it was best for you to leave Hong Kong and learn in the schools where I am from," He replied with a deep depressing sigh.

I then was silent, tears welling up in my eyes as I quietly said good bye to my home where I had lived for so long.

'He cannot see me weak,' I repeated to myself multiple times in my head.

I stepped away from my father and walked to his quarters where I would be staying until we arrived in our destination. I quietly cried myself to sleep that night, knowing in my heart I could never show emotion to anyone, I could not show weakness.

This is why I ended up as I am today. I trained myself to never show emotion, something I consider a weakness. I can never truly be myself, no matter how I try and it pains. It's all China and England's fault, for they are my parents and are the only ones I can trust myself to love anymore. They are the reason why I am, the way I am today.

So before anyone judges a country, like me, about being cruel and unloving. Think about what I have gone through, and judge them on how they are today, because each country has a past that makes them how they are in the present, and eventually the future.

**~Thank you so much for actually reading, it means a lot to me that I can share my stories with you awesome people! Comments are very much loved and I appreciate them all, thanks again for reading!~**


	2. In The Middle- Hong Kong POV

_**~I needed something to write and was having writers block on the Tomate that Stole My Heart. After reading Why I am this Way again I decided to make it like a diary of sorts for countries like Hong Kong , torn apart by the ones they loved. I can't think of another country at the moment so I decided to do one about Hong Kong again, enjoy ^^~**_

**In the Middle- A Hong Kong pov**

I've always been in the middle. Coming from two different worlds isn't always as cool as they put it. Sure, it makes you more interesting when you're in elementary school, where nobody judges too harshly. It isn't until middle school and high school when you know your enemies. Sometimes I walk the halls feeling so alone. Sure, I have a lot of 'friends' but I never feel truly accepted.

That's what I get up for going to school in an almost all white community. At school I'm not the smartest; don't get me wrong I'm certainly not average, more like in the middle between smart and Average. I always strive to do better, but it's hard to do when people look at you funny when you speak up to answer a question in class. Sometimes you can even see the racism glittering in their eyes.

Whenever mom and dad are fighting, it breaks my already fragile heart. It doesn't matter if they are silently fighting or full on arguing, they always want me to take a side. When I do choose a side, I feel as if I'm choosing which person I want to be. If I want to be Asian or white. What I really want to tell them is:

"_Stop! Stop making me choose!"_

"_Don't you see you've hurt me enough?"_

One look at their faces however, my face turns to stone and I try to block them out. Not getting into the middle of the arguments that I've been thrust into since almost birth.

I don't want to choose, I don't want to be in the middle. I want to be free. I'd rather be one race, fully. No other race that tells me apart from everyone else. I know my parents want me to stand out, to succeed. If only they knew I'd rather blend in. If it were a perfect world, I'd want to be…well normal. I'm not saying I'm not normal, if that's what you're getting at. In all honesty I do desperately want to stand out, but at the same time I don't.

I don't want to be a half blood anymore, unfortunately I can't change that. The best I can do now is stick to my family and my so called friends. Tough out my situation until I'm old enough or brave enough to break free. To break free of being in the middle, to break free and to finally be…me.

_**~Thank you for reading! Rate and review. I hope I didn't make that many people cry.~**_


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